Saturday, January 31, 2009

The Nursery School Guide to Politics, Part IV

There was an old woman who swallowed a fly;
I don't know why she swallowed a fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old woman who swallowed a spider
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old woman who swallowed a bird:
How absurd to swallow a bird!
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old woman who swallowed a cat:
Imagine that, to swallow a cat!
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird,
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old woman who swallowed a dog:
What a hog to swallow a dog!
She swallowed the dog to catch the cat,
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird,
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old woman who swallowed a goat:
Just opened her throat to swallow a goat!
She swallowed the goat to catch the dog,
She swallowed the dog to catch the cat,
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird,
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old woman who swallowed a cow:
I don't know how she swallowed a cow!
She swallowed the cow to catch the goat,
She swallowed the goat to catch the dog,
She swallowed the dog to catch the cat,
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird,
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old woman who swallowed a horse:
She's dead, of course!


MORAL: The first question to ask of any government solution to a problem, such as a bailout, is this: "What will it make worse?" And it just might make sense to ask why you swallowed the fly at some point before you start swallowing the horse.